25 years ago I used to define the twatphone as one of these bad boys. I even had one for work at one point. Times have moved on however and the definition of the phrase twatphones has changed in my opinion, these devices are normally worn by idiots commuting to and from London mainly so they do not have to concentrate on a commute or look out for people snd push for their own self centred irrelevant agenda. This is a picture of the new twatphones my ladies and gentlemen. Wearers of these should be avoided at all costs as one of these days a wearer is going to cause and accident by being so self centred and over engrossed in the usually crap music they are listening to that they wont care. If do you go around with a pair of these clamped to your ears you should be rightfully ashamed of your self. Get a life and some self respect! Persoanlly /I would take the Motorola 8800 any dy of the week.
Yes you! Yes you!
- You who cannot commute properly.
- You who twalk – the art of texting while walking down the street.
- You who ride a bloody Brompton bike where you shouldn’t
- You who walk down thee street watching a movie on your iPad
- You who listen to crap music from silly oversized headphones that make you look like a prat!
You basically think you are more important than everyone else around you.
Yes you will be the cause of a fatality soon.
Why do I have to write this?
I don’t normally bang on about the fact that I am disabled but some things have got to come to a head. The amount of hassle that commuting has become because some people do not have a clue is amazing. I choose to crack on with my life and my work and make the best of it. I shouldn’t have to put up with crap like this!
Recent incidents Include:
A Brompton bike rider knocking me over with his bloody bike on the train. I took a fall.
A Brompton bike rider nearly knocking me over whilst he was riding down the platform at Victoria.
2 incidents where I have been pushed over by stupid impatient people who wont look where they are going.
The stand out classic personally was the impatient blonde bint who nearly pushed me under a train at Victoria Station. Judging by the back pack you were wearing you work for PWC. I cant tell you how much I shat myself when I hit the side of that train. I was lucky to recover it and it left me very shaken. The fear of staring into that gap between the train and the platform is one I have no desire to repeat.
Its not just me that this happens to. Its other disabled people, parents with young children and pregnant women. Indeed I saw a pregnant women pushed over on the tube the other day by some inconsiderate twat.
But the final one goes to the young Asian chap with oversized headphones in Wimbledon who nearly got run over by an ambulance on blues and twos which was clearly taking an emergency to St Georges Hospital. Sorry pal, why should an ambulance on a life saving run have to brake for you because you cannot cross a road properly?
So before there is a fatality that is YOUR fault. Learn how to commute properly.
Five months ago, when my mobile kit was due for renewal, I looked at all the options. The new Samsung Edge Phone was not going to last very long in my hands and there new tablet devices were “not doing it for me”. So I ended up opting for an iPhone 6s. I was previously using a Samsung Galaxy S4 and a Samsung Galaxy S3 Tab. I once swore blind I would never have an iPad but prefering to have my tablet and phone from the same vendoe meant that an iPad Air would be forthcoming. I had visions of this switch over being an unmitigated disater, how wrong I was. It took 4 hours on a Sunday afternoon, to get everything configured just the way I like it. So has the new kit performed so far? Well pretty well to be fair. I apreaciate the iPad’s screen size and it feels much better as a day to day companion than the Galaxy. Microsoft have even got the Office apps for the iPad spot on and the spreadsheets I have that use lots of macro’s work fautlessly. So what is wrong with this kit? Only one thing! An over optimistic Siri! The other week I had to take an Uber to central London because I was having a lot of trouble walking. Home wise I am based 13 miles from this office. At 8 am onn this particular morning, Siri informed me that it would take 21 minutes to get there in the car! Try an hour and a quarter stuck in South West London’s finest traffic! In all I am quite happy with the new kit and Apple seem to have sorted out battery life issues as well!
Do you know David?
If you do then I feel sorry for you. The David in question is a Doctor David Selvadurai. He is an ENT consultant at St Georges Hospital. Though some research suggests he doesn’t give a care in the world for his NHS patients and would rather spend time touring the many private hospitals he works at and collecting fat fees. I have never before met such an arrogant, rude and dismissive individual who refuse to answer simple straight direct questions. Both his manner and method are absolutely deplorable.
St Georges Hospital in Tooting have made real strides recently after several run-ins I had with them in 2013 owing to shocking levels of care and poor treatment. Hell, on a visit yesterday I even saw a cleaner actually doing some cleaning and doing a good job of it!
I seriously hope that Dr Selvadurai just slipped through the HR departments net and this is just a one off as opposed to a return to employing absolute idiots who do not deserve to have a job at that hospital or even a job as a burger flipper in MacDonald’s for that matter. Some may argue that Dr Seladurai should just stick to private patients. My personal opinion is that he dosent even deserve a job at MacDonald’s
If you ever have the pleasure of meeting this person, in my opinion you should do as I am doing now and avoid him like the plague.